By One Line – Issue 1. Music

I decided to begin new series of posts where I will observe music or movies or books just by one phrase. Often you cannot say more, and my past experience showed that any intermediate format of review expands to full-length without such a restriction. Welcome then!

Pictograms near the title are analogues of Watch It/Listen It line in full-size reviews:

- definitely awesome but nothing to say

- matter of taste and controversial

- get the fuck out of here

 Forest Poetry – Hatespell

Ildjarn is dead.

/   Ziel Bevrijd – Ziel Bevrijd

If we decide to play cascadian shit with earraping raw sound, we will obtain cascadian shit.

 Hierophant – Hierophant

Unlike dismal american buddy with the same name, spaghetti eaters have shown that they are one of the best it blasphemous and totally furious blackened post hardcore.

 Necrogoblikon – Stench

Burden of being Ensiferum will be never too hard for copycats, but if it is extended by a bit of brain application and experimentation bravery, it is definitely not so bad.

/   Alkerdeel – Morinde

Let me guess how to make fashionable sludge release: mix a noisy ambient background, turn the Fuzz handle on guitar processor all way to the right and add some yet fashionable black metal to avoid death from boredom.

 Vattnet Viskar – Vattnet Viskar

You see, if words “post” and “metal” dominate in “post black metal” word combination, everything is all right and even better.

 Bologna Violenta – Il Nouvissimo Mondo

Weird Mulk clone equipped with artificial intelligence symphonic orchestra and erectile disfunction.

 Aksumite – Prideless Lions

If you want to be a punk/black metal band, do not think too much, or it will get all the concept worse.

 Above – Above

If you want to be a punk/black metal band, do not think too little, or it will get all the concept worse.

 Redneck Zömbiez – Farmed and Dangerous

A fresh yet old-school stream of rawness, heaviness, eclectic and perfect dark humour with absolutely goofy attitude in modern morass of cliches, stupidity and scantiness.

 The Tug Fork River Band – Catch Us For The Metal

Sorry, bros, I am too young for all this southern shit.

 5 Stabbed 4 Corpses – Get Smashed

As fucking heavy and headbanding they sound at live gigs, as noisy, incoherent and insipid they are on recordings.

/   Shoulder of Orion – Lunarborn

I will hardly make a mistake changing the name of this album to Lunarboredom.

 Urogenital Macrophage – Perversion and Sickness Destroy the Human Race

From Chile and raw; brutal as fuck and slamming in the same extent; what are you waiting for, the jesus?

 Ulgz – Ulgz

I didn’t understand anything, but it was cool.

/  The Phoenix Paradox – The Phoenix Paradox

Progressive yet listenable and definitely odd by the standards of the style.

 Habitual Defilement – The Redemption of Past Supremacy

Well, there's egg and bacon; egg sausage and bacon; egg and slam; egg bacon and slam; egg bacon sausage and slam; slam bacon sausage and slam; slam egg slam slam bacon and slam; slam sausage slam slam bacon slam tomato and slam.

 Skullhog – The Evil Dead

Autopsy can retire on a pension with no worry – these guys will carry all their flags and raise their own that hardly are worse.

 Floating Wood – EP 2012

Yawn alert.